OMG I just tried to text you something dirty but accidentally texted the obama campaign
i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
fun fact of the day: the man setting up my checking account at my bank has thrown up on my front lawn.
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
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