we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
Rode my bike to work still drunk. Almost threw up on a camper while getting him out of his parents car.
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
You're a disaster
Wanna date?
He is completely naked, curled in a ball, and rocking back and forth in the shower humming lullabies to himself. This is your responsibility since I'm going to be fucking someone in 5.7 seconds.
Randomize
