so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
I swear to god he was trying to crawl under my door last night muttering "I'm Alex Mac! I'm Alex Mac!"
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
So I've officially decided that I AM that drunken mistake that girls hate themselves for in the morning.
i kind of just want to tell my cleaning lady I'm an alcoholic so it's not awkward when I stumble out of my room to go sit in my car for 2 hours and wait for her to finish cleaning the several empty bottles of wine in my room
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
I can't take any time off so I'll be here drinking mimosas til I puke at home with my kitty
Just asking. Could've given you a lap dance in a sombrero, drenched in corona and tequila.
God Bless cinco de mayo
He put oyster crackers in his ramen noodles. Is that a thing? Because holy shit I had never thought of it before and if it's not a thing he's my new stoner hero for discovering it.
Decided to smoke a bowl in my closet while my parents are gone. Just sat in the closet because I couldn't remember how to get out. Started panicking cuz I thought they were gonna show up... Checked my phone. It's been 4 minutes.
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
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