I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
so went to the condom shack today. bought a condom that dresses up your dick in a suit...tomorrow im fucking in style
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
Randomize
