There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my little brother just told me that I should start chasing my vodka with slim fast. genious.
I still think it's messed up that you're naming your kids after all the guys you slept with in college
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
I just got released from jail. still in my kilt. bring pants damnit. they won't understand.
pants will make it better? really?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
I know you just got dumped by your gf but believe there is still good in the world. I just smoked a joint and took a fucking unbelievable poop. Give me a call tomorrow.
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
I tried saying sorry but instead I puked down her shirt and tried to clean it up... Now I have a bruise on my forehead. good news, before she left she wrote her number on my stomach with sharpie
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