im pretty sure vibrators are the best invention since dinosaur chicken nuggets
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
I had a dream about a vibrator with 42 different settings. If that's not a good indication I need to get laid, I don't know what is
My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don't exist?
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
You tell anyone I'm rocking out to Pitbull in an economy, base-model car, I'll kill you.
I thought I was really making her scream. Turns out she had a Lego jammed in her lower back.
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
Randomize
