I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
There is a bottle of ciroc waiting graciously on my breakfast table. It's almost a sign for me to live up to my Russian blood.
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
I have just discovered the land of milk and honey. and by milk i mean vodka and by honey i mean tequila.
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
Randomize