this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
I took it upon myself to take one shot of tequila to have an excuse for hitting on my not-single coworker. It worked.
Sending emails to my new boss whilst unable to move from the toilet seat because of alcohol. Great start to a new job as a school counselor.
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
Randomize
