the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
The problem is drunk me is completely unaware how poor I am
While I was sneeking out of her apartment, there was a giant cage with a parrot in it. I half expected it to squak "hit and run...hit and run."
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
Randomize
