He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.
it's amazing how much more room there is in my purse when I'm not carrying alcohol in it
My mom walked down and caught me drinking by myself, watching the nanny at 3:30AM. I had no idea what to say
Dont judge me. He may have been ugly but he was INCREDIBLE. He's like the Susan Boyle of sex.
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
Dude I think my special talent is falling in drunkenly falling in front of a cop and getting away. This is the second time.
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
Don't worry I'm alive. The apt is all locked up so I'm sleeping on the patio. The frozen pizza I got might be toast unless someone lets me in soon. If not its all good I'll be here snoring on the patio
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
I think people are normalizing furries
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