It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
So we stole all of the newspapers out of the stands within a 1 mile radius and filled up her car with crumpled newspaper.
Who leaves their car unlocked at night?
Someone who wants to read the newspaper.
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
I wish i had a shirt that said, "I know what you're thinking and it's not herpes on my face"
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
I feel like a great embryo-shaped weight has been lifted off my shoulders.
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers
So I craigslisted sugar daddies and I'm pretty sure I found us one if you can pretend to be asian.
Tell me about it I woke up on your couch with only my underwear on and a 26 year old wrapped around me. I thought my thirties would be different.
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
I have this rep as a wingman for a reason. I'm like a poon caddy. "You might want to use a 9 iron on this hole. "
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts