mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
Is it penis luge time yet?
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
I just gate-crahed a party and met a state senator, so I had an interesting afternoon jog.
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
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