sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
I'll be gone when you wake up but you hit a girl so I knocked you out. Never hit a girl. Unless it's with your penis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
Let's be honest, I'm cooking chicken nuggets in my Helm jersey and underwear who has their life more together than me?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
Got drunk in Atlantic City Flagged down some guy with two wrapped tampons like road flares for a cigarette.
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize