What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
I'm home and safer than post-menopausal sex; you're welcome for the image. And yes, I did just use a semi-colon hammered.
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
Well the pizza delivery man was either startled or incredibly intrigued to see me skateboarding in the living room by myself at 1 in the morning in ripped pantyhose
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
This lady gave me four cups to go along with my gallon of daiquiri. Silly girl, all I need is a straw.
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
Randomize
