who the fuck tagged pancake nipples on my profile picture?
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
He pulled out a red and green condom and then started humming "Here Comes Santa Claus." Happy holidays indeed.
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
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