Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
At the wedding. Seated next to the bar. No way this ends well
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
I woke up in a chipotle parking lot with an industrial sized box of condoms and a bag of dounut holes. I need Jesus
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
Randomize