If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
just told my mom that i'm having a bad day and she responded with "maybe you should pour yourself a nice drink". good to know that my parents support my future of alcoholism
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
Glass of stolen champagne in a to go cup = tastiest hangover cure ever
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
I'm laying in bed cuddling with my teddy bear and eating waffles. I need a fucking boyfriend
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