Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
I love being friends with rich people. I get laid by association.
how to cook rice: 1. put random amount of rice and water in a pot 2. have sex on the kitchen floor. when you are done having sex the rice is ready
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
i'm having the hardest time convincing my roommates to go dumpster diving for pizza with me. i really miss you..
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
My liver needs the occasional pep talk and a reminder that we are two weeks into freshman year of college.
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
I have already put on my inside pants.
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
I made out with the hosts' boyfriend, infront of her, drank way too much, slept in my car and convinced everyone that I'm really a nice person. If that's not skilled lying, I don't know what is.
Randomize
