It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
I had to convince you not to write "happy birthday to the first guy who fingered me" on his facebook wall, right above the post from his current girlfriend's mother.
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
btw telling the cab driver, that took you to your booty call that is now returning your wallet that you left in his cab, that you want to hug him is awkward
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
Got a text that the fed tax return dropped into my account just before getting on the first leg of my flights the Vegas. Fate? Viva Las Vegas!
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
I found a Trump-humping republican virgin born on the goddamn Fourth of July. I NEED to hate-fuck him.
sorry didn’t mean to call you, i was just trying to put the t-rex emoji beside your name
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
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