he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
Just told myself the phrase "You're not THAT single" while dressing myself
The fact that you got a stranger guy to buy you a pizza off tinder makes me feel amazing
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
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