She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
Dude, why did I wake up with ketchup packets in my bed and the stove in my room??
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
Randomize
