6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
So I called her out for all the gossip she does and she's like "you do the same, bitch"
So I was like "Im classy like the Countess, youre just a bitch like Kim."
Kudos on the Interstate Housewife metaphor.
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
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