I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
I'm telling people I'm celibate. It sounds cooler when it's by choice.
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
Dude he's your dog he doesn't love me more than you. I'm just like that cool uncle that takes him to burger king and to see girls.
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
Whiskey. Because sometimes it's fun to have your hands go numb.
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
Randomize
