id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
Please come fuck me. I had the worst sex of my life the other night and I need to be reminded that sex is actually enjoyable
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
So the revenge porn my ex posted just resulted in a contract with a gay porn company. I'm going to make $8,000 this weekend. That would a breakup checkmate. Are you joining me in the legislative committee hearing tomorrow?
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
Randomize
