ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
No matter how drunk I am or how drunk I'll ever be I love you
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
This is your post bachelor party survival text. This a free and complementary service to make sure you are still alive. For alive, say yes. For hurting, say ugh. If lost, say help. If dead, please feel free to not respond. Thank you and we hope you enjoyed the party.
Randomize
