Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
I think tequila should come with a little jiminy cricket
Dude I think I was making out with the cat last night
I don't have a cat..?
Well nonetheless. Whatever it was purred when I used tounge.
He literally just walked in some random persons house and walked right to they're pantry. Then five minutes later he walks out with pop-tarts, mac and cheese, and captain morgan. We need to chill with this kid more often.
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I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
Sorry I didn't pick up for your booty call. I usually am asleep at 4:00 on Thursdays. Like a normal person.
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
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I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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