You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
There's puke on my pillow. I'm still wearing my wedges. And I have a cab drivers number clutched in my fist.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously, you can't give someone's wife an orgasm on the dance floor of a gay nightclub and then hang out with her husband the following week
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
don't care how drunk i am. my dick was like "nope, not doing it, you can't make me and i was like oh yes i can"
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
Randomize