Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
College is the ONLY place where you can pass off morning sickness as being hungover. I'm currently pouring beer in a spray bottle so I can spray it on myself and smell drunk.
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
He's saved in my phone as 'MURICA. I think it's safe to say I'm not exactly taking him seriously.
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
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