in the event that i am dead, my body is laying in the intersection of ... the pearl in springfield. it was my friend's 21st but i think i'm dead. wearing a black top. like i said, probably dead.
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
I don't know whether I should be pissed that there's glitter in my bed or proud that there's semen in there too.
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
the only reason i even kissed her was because we were having sex when it midnight, and i heard people yelling "happy new year."
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
After we won that round of beer pong you attempted to swallow the winning ball whole claiming you had the mouth and jaw of a snake.
A snake? I must've been gone...
After that you got naked and hissed at people the rest of the night..
Randomize
