I am in a vortex of obligation.
Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
Apparently all year they've been using me as a standard of drunkenness
He asked me what I wanted the cake to say and I then asked him if "I'm sorry for throwing up in your bed last night" was too long. He said it was...
I didn't talk to any girls wearing masks because I wanted to avoid making the big mistake of making out with my sister.
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
I want to fling myself into the sun
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
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