Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
I think we should go ahead and pin a note to my shirt when we go out that says"do NOT buy me shots"
On the back we can put possible side effects may include: indiscriminate making out, brief crying spells, yelling in jibberish, and sudden sleep.
She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
i think i have weasels eating my brain. Also there is a skeleton staring at me from the back of the bathroom door. it's an awkward vomit. come find me please
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
Why were you not born a dude?
Because god wanted to level the playing field
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
Dude, you ever snap awake on the toilet at work with that panicked, "How long have I been here?!" feeling??
did you know that sneaking into a golf course at midnight is a felony? the cop made sure to tell us after she peed on the course and hit on him
Randomize
