just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
Remind me never to smoke before babysitting again. Ate an entire bottle of children's gummy vitamins.... not an easy thing to explain to parents.
A woman with Alzheimer's pointed at me and said, "Don't forget to wear socks, because you're a lady!" I think it's legit advice.
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
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