For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
We had half a pitcher of beer left and he asked us if we wanted a to-go cup. Fuck yeah we want it to-go.
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
I think my fortune cookie is telling me I give good blowjobs.
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
I'm sorry I couldn't bail you out, apparenty they dont take credit cards over the phone. Did you at least make any friends in jail?
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
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