In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
I really thought I'd be the only alcoholic drinking alone in my car at noon in the Lowe's parking lot. Passed out dude in the car next to me begs to differ.
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
My parents heard a lamp fall and crash and the dogs were barking like crazy so my mom got up to check. she found you peeing in a corner by the tv. And you kept shhhing her.
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
Randomize
