when a girl says 'did you just try to kiss me' you should leave the bar. trust me.
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. It doesn't matter what it's about. Last text was about a homeless dude
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
Randomize
