Whod you bang
Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
I told him I had an IUD and he asked me how was a bomb a form of birth control..
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
Randomize
