David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
woke up this morning with pubes superglued to my face, not my pubes
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
Randomize
