Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
i fucking swear, saying shit like "i dont get jealous" is like personally inviting your slutty friend to fuck the guy you slept with like a month ago
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
Who else will cuddle and watch the Bachelor with me then finger bang me during the rose ceremony
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
Randomize
