Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
Is it socially acceptable to order two burrito bowls?
anything's socially acceptable if you do it with enough confidence
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
Note to self: never fuck a Canadian, surprisingly highly disappointing
I just wrote a self loathing message to self, wrapped my credit card in it, put it in an envelope, sealed it with another hate messame, and put it in my lock box. So. That's where I'm at.
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