My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
1 month til my stepdad becomes a u.s. citizen, so if you want to get in on the divorce pool its your last chance, $5 a square.
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
"Functional." Your standards for how you feel after drinking are so high.
When your night starts by chugging margarita and drinking vodka out of tupperware, I feel it's best to stay realistic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
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