Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
I'm done trying to be a vegetarian. My vagina smells like hummus.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
Woke up with an epic boner today, the kind where you can spin books and shit on it. FYI: don't try spinning an encyclopedia
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I take back everything I said about communal showers
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had sex while you were puking this morning and I'm sorry. Kind of.
It's ok. I had sex while you were drunk crying last night. We're even.
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
I had nothing but condoms at the checkout, then grabbed a pack of Orbitz gum and said "gotta protect from bad breath" felt like a boss
Remembering you have vodka in the freezer gives the same surge of happiness as finding 20 bucks in a coat pocket.
I think it’s appropriate to celebrate the start of mother’s day at the bar with the men that almost made me a mother
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