You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
I think its a sure sign I need to get laid when every cloud in the sky looks like a penis.
dibs on John Mayer's hood pass
I went to go pee and found a strand of your hair wrapped around my penis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
Im pretty sure my housekeeper high fived her on the way out this morning
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
I just slipped on ice and peed on my pea coat. There's a pun there but I'm too sad to make it
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