Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
there are chunks of pepperoni under the sheets. can you be here in 10? breakfast in bed?
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
At least I know that however bad my life gets and how low I can feel I'll never feel shitting in a red robin parking lot low
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
i'm extremely hungover on the ski bus and the driver is playing abba. this. is. not. okay.
Randomize
