He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
I don't know where my bra went.
Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy.
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
hold on i need to sex proof my eyelashes. thank godd for waterproof mascara
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
OMG I DIDNT READ THAT TEXT CAREFULLY CAUSE I'M ON THE DEVILS LETTUCE & I THREATENED TO PUNCH A CHILD OMG I'M SO SORRY
I'll be coming off of 7 days of not drinking. No horse tranqs either. I haven't been this sober since I was in the womb
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