I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
I woke up this morning and thought "Im sure I've seen this house in a porno" and instantly googlemapped myself
I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
No, it's cool, I just bounced from the hospital. I was...talking to a security guard, maybe?
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
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