Check if I'm alive tomorrow. If not, tell my parents I died happy and that there's a gay cheerleader in the spare bedroom
It's alarming how good I'm getting at being productive at work on Thursday after Johnny Walker Wednesdays.
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
As I'm trying to leave her house she shushes me and puts my hand on her boob, then goes back to sleep. In like 30seconds. What the fuck.
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
Randomize
