More tranny stories later!
How do you jack off and text at the same time?
On my iPhone they have an app for that
and that's why we call him explosion in my pants. no one remembers his real name.
She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
Cancelling your gym membership calls for alcohol.
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
I wish I could open myself up and check on my liver. Make sure it's hanging on. Ya know?
I feel like I'm a car that keeps getting Bacardi 151 instead of fuel
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
Randomize
