Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?
idk, I had a turtle in mine.
They only remember me when they're drunk...I'm like a suppressed memory.
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
I need the number of a restaurant that delivers, has lock-picking abilities, and is okay with full frontal male nudity. Entirely too hungover to get out of bed.
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
If your night didn't end with writing a witness report for the cops at a shwarma place, your night was probably less interesting than mine.
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
Yes, you can go into Petsmart drunk but the cats awaiting adoption don't appreciate the soft pretzels squeezed through their cages.
I enjoy the company of your penis
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