I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
You asked the dj to play 'who let the dogs out" because it was your birthday. You left the bar and then re-entered to the song
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm reciting my presentation (beer in hand) on the porch to a snowmen audience.
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
He's my BOYFRIEND but he won't sext me. I'll be like, "tell me how you want to fuck me", and he's like, "I love how we can talk about our feelings". FUCK
The dude at Coffee Bean just handed me my tea latte and whispered, "pomegranate blueberry is such a sexy flavor". With a wink. I'm almost certain that there's an STD floating around in my drink.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just need like a magic vacuum to suck everything out of me and then an IV to put good stuff back in
That sounds worse than that time you thought out an entire story of how big bird would kill you
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
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