Just found a copy of intimate toy times in my mom's trash can...
You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
Randomize
